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The Mission of to

Stimulate social conversation and raise the awareness of the effect that gender transitioning has on the Significant Others, Friends, Families, and Allies (SOFFAs) of transgender persons — especially in the early stages of transition.

why increase awareness?

According to The Williams Institute, School of Law there are over 1,400,000 transgender people in the United States today—a number many feel is under-reported.

If we conservatively estimate that for every one transgender person there are four SOFFAs (Significant Other, Friends, Families, and Allies) in close relationship with them, then there are at least 5,600,000 adults who have either gone through—or are going through—their own mental and emotional transition in response. 

Despite the numbers and the need, however, there are only a handful of resources available for SOFFAs. Some of the best of what is available is on the Resources for Partners page of this site. We anticipate that list will grow as the awareness of SOFFAs’ needs expand.

A wholistic View

Simply put (our goal given this complicated topic) we hope fills a need; that it gives voice to SOFFAs’ experiences and expands the support by family/marriage and gender therapists, online LGBTQ support organizations, medical professionals, clergy and others; and that it encourages support for both SOFFAs and transgender people’s mental and emotional well-being.

In fact, one of the few studies that has been done (in the United Kingdom) showed that when focused support is given to SOFFAs, they in turn lend authentic support to transgender people. In this way, everyone involved is more apt to lead normal, healthy lives. 

By the way, when we say giving “voice,” to the needs of SOFFAs, we don’t mean solely our own. There are as many emotional, spiritual, sexual and even physical scenarios happening as there are people going through transition. Our intention is to stimulate conversations through feedback and comments, via guest blog authors, and by encouraging others to talk about SOFFA's needs, too. We also want to read your own blogs and stories on such platforms as Medium, Google Blogger, Tumblr, the TGP Blog, etc., so that you too, can provoke public discussion.

In the meantime, we continue to learn and grow—both in our lives and as facilitators of this site.

Please forward your feedback via email at


Maisie and Guinevere